Dear Lady on the checkout at M&S,
Thank you so much for not recoiling as a coughing and spluttering, dishevelled blonde, eyes heavy with cold, came towards you this evening. Thank you also for not looking horrified as she dug in her pocket for money, and pulled out a few coppers, stub wires, pine needles, and half a dog biscuit.
It wasn't always like this, I used to live in W11, and wear beautiful shoes, and drink cocktails - I just wanted you to know.
Yours in heartfelt appreciation
Miss P
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