Web person : We have reports of spam from your website, please deal with this.
Miss P. : What? How? Where? How do i deal with it?
Web person: Spam is coming from www.misspickering.com
Miss P: *checks website sees advert for porn channel for men who like women with large breasts*
Miss P. : Clearly this is not me spamming people, rather i have been hacked, any suggestions on how i go about resolving this?
Web person: We can't verify it isn't you, we have suspended your account.
Miss P. : I can assure it isn't, I pedal products of a floral not pornographic nature
3 hours pass
Web person: You are correct the spam is coming from a file attached to your website
Miss P. : and therefore i should.....?
Web person: You need to delete the files as a matter of urgency
Miss P. : Any idea on where these files are or how i delete them?
Web person: You need to delete the files
Miss P. How? How do i delete the files?
Web person: You need to delete the files
Miss P.: I appreciate i need to delete the files, but perhaps you give me some clue as to where these files are? Seeing as how you are the expert and all.
Web person: You just need to delete the files.
This morning the PDQ machine broke down, did you know there are many departments within the call in case of breakdown department. I spoke to 9 different ones.
Then a lady came in
"I would love your job, it must be so calming, getting to play with flowers all day"
If you need me I will be face down in a box of cream slices.